My Top 10 Summer Fashion Don'ts

1.  Shorty short shorts a.k.a. Daisy Dukes a.k.a. Booty Shorts!  Now, I'm not saying that if you are young enough, in shape enough and/or confident enough that you should not strut your stuff in your short shorts.  I rocked mine out in my twenties and even into my thirties and could maybe, possibly still rock them on occasion now if I was having an I'm gettin' better with age moment  it was a hundred and ten degrees of humid heat outside.   


What I am saying is that no matter what your age, weight or shape, if your butt cheeks are hanging out of your shorts then you, girlfriend, have gone too far and need to redefine what "short shorts" means to you. 


If you aren't sure, hold that hand mirror up and check your junk in the big mirror. If you see any bare butt flesh, you have crossed the line and should not pass Go, collect your 200 dollars or turn that door knob and step foot out your house until you cover that stuff up.


And words on the booty shorts?  Double Don't! And men in short shorts of any kind?...Triple Dog Don't!  

                            

2. Speedos. K, so I'm pretty sure this one goes without saying but I'm still gonna say it. Just Say No.  'Nuff said.  

3. Capris for men. I realize this is a double standard because the good Lord knows I love my capris in the summer but it is my personal opinion that capri pants should not be considered as a fashion choice for men, but if either of my boys ever get the idea to try a pair, I will try my darndest not stand in their way. Though I will strongly encourage them to consider ALL their options first.  


And if Charlie ever decided he wanted to sport a pair, well then I'd recommend getting a good sturdy umbrella because the pigs would be flying, and I mean a flyin'  high! 


Sorry Ashton, but it's a No for me.

4. Teva and Birkenstock Sandals. And this goes for anything remotely resembling a pair.  Now I realize there is quite a large number of people who can't live without theirs and have sat and listened to many of them go on and on about how comfortable and cushy soft they are and I understand that some folks need extra support for their flat feet, fallen arches and what not and I'll give them that.  Just please, for the love of Pete, do NOT, under any circumstance, wear socks with them.  Please, I beg you!  

  
5. Pantyhose With Sandals.  This is never a good look.  NEVER.  Again, I understand there are some ladies who need the support hose but at least cut the toes outta those babies if you feel you absolutely must wear them with your sandals.  I think they even make toe-less ones now if I am not mistaken....Hose without toes they call them.  

  
6. Crocs for anyone over the age of 12.  I know Crocs have been insanely popular for the past several years though I haven't been seeing them around quite as often as I once did and praise the heavens above for that! But there are still quite a few pairs creeping around out there.    


Unless you are still in the cute stages of childhood or you are tilling, digging or planting in your garden, leave the Crocs where they belong...in the children's department!  

7. Bralessness in Public.  Now some of you who are small busted may just be able to get away with this and if you are one of those women, then more power to you, sister!  More power to you!


But the good vast majority of us have no business letting our girls fly free in the wind, especially those of us who are a C and up.
Trust me, I live in the South so I know that evil ol' brassiere can be a nightmare to strap on when it's a sticky 95 degrees with a hundred and ten percent humidity outside. 


But we must, we must, we must control our busts!  


8. Wearing Uggs with Shorts or just in Summer, period!  I am personally not a big fan of the Uggs and all their relatives myself, even in the winter months, though they don't bother me quite as much then.  


But this?!  Well, this just leaves me feeling confused.  Oh Britney, bless her heart! 

9. Men's Dress loafers without Socks. This was not a good look for Don Johnson in 1985, is not a good look still today and shall not ever be for forever and evermore....amen.

10. The Fanny Pack.  I must confess right here and now that I was once a fanny pack Don't.  Seems I recall struttin' my stuff all over Disney World circa 1995 with my fanny pack strapped around my waist but I have since corrected the error of my fanny pack ways.  

I know it's a convenient way to keep up with all your junk when you're hitting the amusement parks and doing the tourist thing on your summer vacation but opt for a cute little backpack instead.  They make tons of stylish ones now.  Like this pretty canvas one by Fossil. 

What are some of your Summer Don'ts?  Mama Kat wants to know.